Packet #115: Cheetos Fiery Jalapeno & Cheese

Cheetos are the kind of Crisp you see on TV. They are exotic, dare I say, slightly thrilling to see in the wild. When you see a Cheetos packet, it brings to mind 1980s programmes from America where all the children had telephones in their bedrooms.

But when I see them do I want to purchase them? No. And why’s that, I hear you ask? Do you think I’m too intimidated by their strange and foreign charm? It’s nothing like that, it’s just that I don’t like a cheesy puff sorta Crisp. I’ve tried them but they’re not the Crisp that calls to me.

However, in the queue in Aldi the other day, dear reader, call they did. I saw this packet of Cheetos Fiery Jalapeno & Cheese twists and I thought to myself, this is something that needs to be explored further.

I impulse bought them (exactly what Aldi hoped would happen) and took them home. Cracking them open after lunch, I was immediately struck by their size. These Crisps are HUGE. Each twist is about the same length as those pencils you get free in Ikea. And they’re thick too, like a large stick of rock.

On the packet, it looks like they’re a normal Crisp colour, but actually they’re a deep red inside the pack, HEAVILY coated in seasoning. “You’re not going to get away from this Crisp session with a clean top,” I thought to myself. And I was correct.

The initial bite was a little cheesy and a LOT spicy. And it’s a builder too. Sometimes Crisps claim to be spicy but they’re lacking. These certainly live up to their Fiery name.

So I like the novelty size. The flavour and spice is good, if a little intense. Sure they’re messy, but I won’t write them off for that. However, for me, the texture here is just off.

If you like a regular Cheeto, you’ll probably be down for this. But as they’re not my usual bag, I couldn’t really get past it. They’re soft and dense, so they stick in your teeth even worse than a Monster Munch or Chickatee.

I finished the whole bag over a couple of sittings, but certainly wouldn’t rebuy. Although if you want to have a powerfully spicy experience and have a gentle reminder of said experience in your teeth for several hours, then this just might be the Crisp for you.

Christine.